I'm being censored!!

[Sheila]

This is a song I wrote about my relationship with my father. I posted it on my family message board and my mother CALLED ME AT WORK to ask me if I was alright because the song was "too morbid". She doesn't want the rest of the family to know that I don't always do cartwheels in gumdrop fields through rainbows. OH GOD I AM SOOO ANGRY RIGHT NOW! As long as my mother is watching, I just can't be me... I think you'll catch the reference in the last line.

Flowers When I’m Gone


If I was bleeding from my waist
And needed a tourniquet
Would you hug me only then?
Or even then?

Daunte dreams escape me
As I switch through my various fantasies
And I know why I am doing this
I know what I am doing.

"You know what?
If you drink you drink in my house!"

Okay

"You know what?
Don’t put flowers on my grave

Give them to me when I’m still alive"

are you sure?


(he said)
"Don’t’ give me flowers when I’m gone
Give them to me when I’m alive."

Some tears need to be cried
You know it’s okay now that your mother has died
Let it out
Don’t be shy
It’s okay to cry

Is it okay to love me?
It is okay to love you?

Now I’m swimming in a sea of honey.
Not my fault you don’t come down.

[Adey]

Nice work Sheila, if I may offer a comment..

The line "Don't put flowers on my grave, give them to me when I'm still alive", is a killer. Love it.

Parents always start to fret when a trace of individuality escapes - at least that's my observation..

[Sheila]

adey said:

Nice work Sheila, if I may offer a comment..

The line "Don't put flowers on my grave, give them to me when I'm still alive", is a killer. Love it.

Parents always start to fret when a trace of individuality escapes - at least that's my observation..

The line you like is a direct quote from my father. I am tempted to get him flowers--it would confuse the hell out of him unless he read this song!

The problem is with my mother---we never got along and the more I express myself the more nervous she gets (but she tries--my parent's front room is like the Sheila Strabley gallery--she's even asking me to do another painting for the dining room!) It's because she's trying to make ammends and I am willing to try but this phone call really upset me. There was a reason I never showed her my songs. I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for my rocky relationship with me mum--I took Kate Bush on as my mother figure.

Thanks Adey for your comments--My dad can say some pretty intense things can't he?

(how obvious is it I am Daddy's little girl? )

[Adey]

sheila said:

(how obvious is it I am Daddy's little girl? )

As most women of a certain age are apparently, in the same way that many men are Mummy's boy.

Or not..

Oedipus? Freud? Fraud? who can say..

[Sheila]

adey said:

sheila said:

(how obvious is it I am Daddy's little girl? )

As most women of a certain age are apparently, in the same way that many men are Mummy's boy.

Or not..

Oedipus? Freud? Fraud? who can say..

I can say. My family is like a see-saw. My mum and my sis on one side and my dad and I on the other. It has been this way since our births. Very long story. The whole reason I got into Kate in the first place was I took her over as my mother figure due to my own mother's verbal abuse. (sticks and stones can break my bones but names will crush and kill me). My father on the other hand always supported me.

I had a room up a flight of stairs above the garage. I drew in pastels on one side Kate with her her wings out from the back cover of NFE, and on the other side Kate (with her wings still out) but with her knees up on the other side. It was the only time I remember in my life my father yelling at me (my mum yelled at me constantly undermining my confidence to this day) "YOU ARE 18 YEARS OLD I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO TELL YOU NOT TO DRAW ON THE WALLS!!!" He was angry. But when he saw it finished, he said, "You know what Sheila, that IS really cool!" (NQ-daughter of N. King! )

Although the pattern has been there since birth, the older I get the more I am like my dad. I even have every intention of making him listen to Aerial. Hey--I got him into Enya it's a viable shot!